If taking care of yourself meant going no contact and you not only sacrifice your mother but your daughter too, would—or even could you do it? It takes courage.
Ever read a blog post so real, so relatable that you wanted to meet its author? I was lucky enough to do just that in MDTA’s first guest interview with author Heather Valentine, creator of Substack’s Elastic Heart. Get ready to feel like a fly on the wall as you encounter the vicissitudes and internal victories of her life. Here, we get deep but don’t worry Academicians*, Heather knows how to swim…
As I read,“1997 Mother’s Day,” I saw a woman who has lived through the trials, tribulations and challenges of transcending Mama Drama Trauma. In it, Heather exposes her vulnerability in dealing with the most excruciating parts of her journey.
Well written, sure, but I wasn’t expecting this bright little summer read to enlighten me so much about how MDT can develop empathy, what it takes to build courage for self-care, and the transformative power of reframing maternal burdens into blessings. A journey far from easy, I had to invite this authentically witty and unintentionally wise author (and person as you will hear), who gets it.
Another author and speaker I adore is spiritual mystic and medical intuitive, Carolyn Myss who teaches about the difference between fate and destiny. She says fate is tied to “we” and survival which is taught by the family, but destiny is about “I” which is something we must define through individual soul alignment. MDT healing is a lifelong journey to the destiny of “I” which in my experience can take multiple lifetimes. In it, we eventually choose to align by integrating the experience as another form of love. This love is not the kind of we are or are not taught, but the countless internal actions we choose to transform it into the love we need.
We hear a lot about brain plasticity and the power of changing our thoughts but that is impossible without stretching the heart from “we” to “I” and back to “we” after integrating or growing from the pain—every heroine’s journey.
That’s the heart elasticity Heather Valentine shares.
So, If you are on the brink of giving up on yourself, the uphill journey to personal peace or life in general listen to her story. You can also download the Substack app for easy reading, listening and to engage on the chat.
Podcast theme song: The Pretenders I’m a Mother
I'm a mother
Treat me like a mother
You wanna suck on my breast
It's no surprise you do
I'm the source and the force
You owe your life to, brother
Oh
Oh
Oh
I'm a mother
And I take like a mother
I understand blood
And I understand pain
There can be no life without it
Never doubt it
I'm a mother
I gave you all my money
To help the family
But what you do to me
Don't humiliate me
Remember
I'm a life-long member
Oh
Oh
Oh
I'm a mother
Treat me like a mother
In the middle of the night
I be deep in a dream
You fancy little company
You only have to scream
Loud, brother
Oh
Oh
Oh
I'm a mother
And I fake like a mother
I understand time
And it isn't on my side
But to service mankind
I have to suffer his pride
Like a mother
Oh
Oh
Oh
You say your protection
Is proof of your affection
If I need security
I'll keep a gun on me
Oh
Don't barter with me
Don't barter with me
Little sacrifices
Go straight to heaven
But hunting season's over
This is the 20th century
Oh
Don't barter with me
Oh
Oh
Oh
I'm a mother
And I ache like a mother
If there's a terrible crash
And bodies thrown everywhere
I'll wrap 'em up and carry 'em
If someone has to bury them
Brother
Oh
Oh
Oh
Call upon mother
I'm the vessel of life
I got the trauma here to prove it
When it's time for me to labour for you
Everybody move it
Like a mother
Oh
Oh
Oh
Have something instructive, entertaining or inquisitive to share with us this summer session? Do let me know. Happy summer reading!
*Academician = MDTA subscriber
Mama Drama Trauma Healing Oracle Deck (each deck includes: PDF guidebook, free 8-part how to read the deck video playlist, and free one on one introductory video call with Tammy) is our foundational tool supporting a daily practice of living in loving detachment based on the core teaching of divinity identity).
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MDT Sound Therapy (session songs playlist)
Courage to Care About Yourself More Than Mama, the Drama or Trauma