What Is the Mother Wound?
The “mother wound” is unmet maternal needs. More specifically, the “mother wound” is a condition in which the mother projects her own unmet maternal needs onto her child causing emotional and, or physical abandonment and, or abuse.
While rejection through abdication of responsibilities and physical abuse are observable, and often obvious, each child has unique emotional needs for maternal needs are the: maternal presence, maternal provision of care and maternal protection..
Coined by Sigmund Freud, the term ”mother wound” conjures up images of the therapist couch, deep reflection and incurable depression, but beyond that, we know little about it. While used in popular lexicon, this planetary disorder remains taboo, unchallenged and its origin unexamined.
We have only begun to scratch the surface of this pandora box of maternal abandonment and abuse opened a century later ago. Because of the diverse perceptions and vying reactions siblings of the same mother have to her, psychologists, inner work life coaches and spiritual counselors are stymied by what constitutes the mother wound.
In this post, we’ll look at 1)what the wound is 2)the origin of the mother wound 3)how it shows up 4) why it shows up, 5)its affect 6)how to realign with the divine.
After the brief definition, dive further into the concept and add more context and explanation if needed.
The lack of the kind of maternal presence, care provision and protection—we need—shows up in five different forms: divine mother, great mother, earth mother, birth mother, motherland or other (adoptive or surrogate) mother.
Each form is a part of our yin DNA, endocrine and parasympathetic systems and determines our state of emotional balance, calmness, comfort and contentment in life. Mother wounds are excruciatingly painful, not to punish but to signal we have strayed too far from who we are designed and destined to be.
Denormalizing Mother Sin
Being informed about our mother wound is about self love, compassion and acceptance that is not only emotionally validating and self soothing but releases us and mama from shame, blame or guilt because we understand the cycle.
Mama Drama Trauma Academy teaches that breaking it is not about indicting, judging or condemning it but approaching it as a spiritual crisis. This gives us space to heal by reconnecting to our own internal clarity, balance and confirmation of who we are and are worthy of by divine birthright.
For too long, we have been baffled by and in mother wound denial because we did not know how to heal it.
Faith based on belief in “sin” is the origin of the mother wound.
Sin means “separation” and “missing the mark”. The only thing that separates us from God is a belief that we are. By default, we miss the mark. The mark is our divine birthright to health, happiness and wholeness. Therefore, the origin of the mother wound is belief in our inherent disconnection from source.
Operating when from a belief we are doomed to be separate deeply wounds both mother and child, we have to get savvy and find out where the wound resides in our psyche, how and why it shows up the way it does, and cut ourselves some slack in the healing process that transcends religious trend, dogma and the wounds they inflict..
The truth is we are dearly loved divine children of the great Mother Father God who are never judged, condemned or left alone.
6 Types of Mother Wounds
The MDTA (Mama Drama Trauma Academy) categorizes six types of mother wounds. A compassionate examination of the healing crisis, each type shows up differently depending on the energetic quality and combination of unmet the unmet maternal needs of presence, provision of care and protexcion.
How and where the mother wound shows up determines how it affects our experience of maternal separation as well as how open we are to circumstances that conspire to create opportunities for us to receive the love we need.
#1. Divine Mother
How it shows up
Perceived Divine Mother separation is a spiritual crisis experienced as internal disconnect from the feelings or the formation of the mother bond. No connection to mother. Deep void and desire for maternal needs to be met without having to ask, wanting others to sense them to prove “their love” or that they care. Need to be “babied”.
Where it shows up
Wounding of the 8th and root chakras associated with mental and rectal health issues, and perceived as a spiraling feeling or perpetual ungroundedness at the intuitive (soul) and instinctual (ego) level where our physical body connects to divine love eight to ten inches above the head and at the coccyx bone.
Why it shows up
One can be very empathic and intuitively astute causing them to absorb and project unexpressed rage to detox. There is extreme emotional dysregulation with even the most subtle imagined and unimagined threat to one’s safety and security is felt.
Difficulty gaining one’s footing in life, when achieved is short lived and, or no matter how much is achieved never feeing there is enough safety or security. Constant state of emotional insecurity affecting a lifelong pursuit for a home and belonging. Rage around a lack of affection.
Inner Work
To begin receiving clear, balanced and reliable intuition, intentional reconnection with Divine Mother, The Still Small Voice of the Holy Spirit, must be established and vigilantly maintained. Understanding what feels like a lack of care from others is really a karmic need to use one’s own gifts, talents and abilities to anticipate and fulfill own needs. Individuals intensely under the spell of this mother sin have harsh planetary aspects in our birth charts for which there are many remedies and effective healing modalities. MDTHOD + (Become a paid subscriber for more on this)
Tapping into the universal energy of the eighth chakra in a balanced way reframes the need for birth mother bonding to a nonjudgmental and noncondemning response to mama’s:
• Death
• Inability to bond well with us from the get go
• Mental ill
• Hospitalization
• Lost child, lack of her own maternal bond, or reference point for being an attentive, involved parent
• Shock from trauma
• Present from her point of view and doesn’t/didn’t have a clue about what was really needed by us
How to Reconnect with Divine Mother Energy
Transform divine mother sin to self regulation through the rewiring and refiring of the neuro network with daily recitation and practice of the divinity identity mantra:
I am a dearly loved divine child of the Divine Mother Father God who is never judged, condemned or left alone.
#2. Great Mother
How it shows up
Perceived Great Mother separation is a soul crisis experienced as a disconnect from self love and compassion due to experiencing the Terrible Mother. There are three Mother archetypes: Good Mother who sacrifices her life for her child, Terrible Mother who sacrifices her child’s life for her own and Great Mother who is and gives birth to both manifested in light ( Good Mother) and shadow (Terrible Mother), symbolized in composite goddess form of many names, as well as the lunar cycle, earth, water elements and in cycles of birth and rebirth.
Where it shows up
Wounding of the root and sacral chakras associated with reproductive system and elimination problems, lower back, leg, or feet issues, genitalia, sexual addiction or indifference, co-dependency or emotional overwhelm.
Why it shows up
One is survival oriented. Aspirations and relationships are based on fulfilling basic necessities such as food, water, and shelter, a drive to thrive materialistically on a grand scale, or an indulgence in some form of sensory sensual pleasure.
Feeling unsupported causing a lack of resilience that leads to low self esteem or confidence in one’s ability to achieve personal desires.
Inner Work
Practice living in loving detachment from mama, drama and the trauma by owning the birthright to be happy, healthy and whole. Individuals feeling intense shame, blame or guilt for need to do inner work of reconditioning the mind with daily recitation and practice of the divinity identity mantra:
I am a dearly loved divine child of the Divine Mother Father God who is never judged, condemned or left alone.
Activating root and sacral energies by setting and achieving creative goals and aspirations we begin to define and establish our unique divinity identity which allows our angels, guides and ancestors to work with us more directly and more effectively to heal the affects of mama being:
• Emotionally cut off to protect herself from the unresolved pain of her own childhood
• Afraid to show her love, afraid to bond with anyone
• Regretting having a child/ren and not wanting to be there
• An addict tuned out on drugs and/or alcohol
• Attending to her own wounds
• Internally conflicted and/or ashamed motherhood felt like work to her
How to Reconnect with Great Mother Energy
Healthy integration of Great Mother energies is about creating authentic internal dialogue with our sacred selves instead of focusing on the sin. This allows us to feel loved, cared for and protected when the Terrible Mother within or without is activated for any reason at any time.
The inner work of taking power back from the Terrible Mother is a religious practice of self inquiry. Connected with sensuality, and our desires and unique ways we cultivate joy and abundance in our lives, the sacral chakra is our creative powerhouse. Applied to the daily practice of compassionate self reflection, we can defuse triggers, or our unhealed wounds by anticipating and feeling them until they no longer hold a charge for us. This is deep impersonal work that requires patience and the maturity to be intentional and self observing without judgment or condemnation in order to become aware of where our power is being lost, drained, blocked, or taken away from where it would be better applied, enjoyed, or used to serve.
#3. Birth Mother
How it shows up
Perceived Birth Mother separation is an ego body crisis experienced as divinity disconnection, an unwillingness or an inability to perceive the mother as a dearly loved divine child of the Divine Mother Father God who is never judged, condemned or left alone.
Where it shows up
Wounding of the sacral and gut chakras associated with issues with the liver, colon, kidney, bladder, improper nutrient processing and absorption, constipation, or irritable bowel syndrome, eating and anxiety disorders.
Why it shows up
One feels disconnected from self and others and unable to adjust to present realities remaining stuck in the past or living in the future creating emotional dysregulation or blockage, often vacillating between these states.
Emotional crisis stemming from the toxic load of shame, blame and guilt for being less than divine, unworthy of health, happiness and wholeness. Quickly forgetting, suppressing or simply not knowing the cause of one’s emotional state.
Inner Work
Instead of feeling bad about who we are, one at a time we can focus on one thing that will make us feel better about ourselves now. Would it be taking a bubble bath? Cleaning our room? Finally responding to friend’s call or email? Nothing is too small to start the ball rolling. The important thing is to begin to feel better and better about who we are and what we do. Inch by inch, this focus transforms shame, blame and guilt to into health, happiness and wholeness and away from mama’s issues:
• Spending all her energy trying to protect herself from a raging or abuse partner
• Feeling worn out, exhausted, or physically ill
• Being too busy with her romantic and sexual liaisons
• Avoiding contact with us because she feels guilt and inadequacy as a mother
• Having/had too many children to attend to
How to Reconnect with Birth Mother Energy
Emotionally grounding through the process of daily mood tracking to develop self love and spiritual independence, or uplifting inner dialogue with the divine that creates conscious space to process enormous pain bit by bit. Consciously activating the gut the trust what is and is not true for us, we govern our relationship with change and develop our ability to manage it.
#4. Earth Mother
How it shows up
Perceived Earth Mother separation is a mental crisis experienced as birthright disconnection a result of dissociation or mental illness caused by climatic trauma or experiencing a natural disaster. One’s existence is not trusted, the world is perceived was an unsafe place and, or earth as a threat to versus supportive of one’s survival.
Where it shows up
Wounding of the gut and heart chakras associated with ulcers, diabetes, pancreas, heart, lungs, chest, arms, hands, circulation and blood pressure.
Why it shows up
One feels deep sadness and external world reflects internal battle with feelings of instability, loss and self defensiveness.
Disposition of general malaise, broken heartedness causing hopelessness, suicidal thoughts and desires to end one’s suffering.
Inner Work
To reverse the loss of power leaking from the root chakra to the heart stand on the ground, close your eyes, enter the imaginary plane and will the earth into being your planetary playground. Visualize the chakras leaking energy from the heart below as it expands to surround the earth and breath. Maintaining the vision, allow it to finish spilling out of the body until your aura completely encircles you and the earth. Breathe. Feel yourself animating the flow of the ocean, rivers, waterfalls and lakes. Breathe. Listen. Feel yourself as the wind blowing, the breeze rustling trees and your gut as the molten center of the earth. Breathe.
Allow yourself to feel this powerhouse of energy supporting transformation and unification within you as you exactly how and when it needs to happen.
Likewise, allow Earth Mother energy, the flesh of your body to purposely yet impersonally align with your unique life path inviting more bodies in the form of relationships that support to its highest spiritual potential. Using your energy in this way will help you emotionally regulate because it is more worthy of it than focusing on mama being:
• Emotionally numb from medication
• Depressed and lacking the emotional or mental resources
• Just a child herself
• Going to school, pursuing her own interests
How to Reconnect with Earth Mother Energy
Mutual respect is the calling card for peace on earth. Earth Mother sin sees her as a plot of land to stake a flag into, use and abuse instead of the ever present, ancient soul portal and sentient being she is. While we can hold her, we do not control how she that cradles, and sometimes rocks the soul. We are but guests of her home paying the dust she gives for rent and to dust we return. How we chose to use this gift of generosity determines the quality of our stay.
#5. Motherland
How it shows up
Perceived Motherland separation is a material crisis experienced as disconnection from “the other” or ego identity attachment. Difficulty experiencing healthy personal or monetary exchange with others because of an inability to see self and others as dearly loved divine beings of the Great Mother Father God who are never judged, condemned or left alone.
Where it shows up
Wounding of the heart and throat chakras associated with circulatory and respiratory systems, heart and lung conditions as well as creativity, self expression, thyroid imbalance, throat, and hearing difficulties.
Why it shows up
Material (money, food, shelter) crisis caused by religious, cultural or political conflicts between tribes, communities and families.
Self-imposed separation from humanity through imaginary borders, invented religions and barbaric cultural beliefs judging and condemning entire nations for petty rivalries better settled between individuals or clans at best.
Motherland shame, blame and guilt of others causes war, forced emigration and immigration globally impacting individuals’ traumas (e.g. mother wound).
For example, as the de facto motherland of the modern west, the US is blamed by Russia for not properly integrating them and into global geopolitics after the Cold War; by Saudi Arabia for not leading the Middle East to peace; by China for not stabilizing the region, and by Europe and Africa for not being a good child of its elderly parents.
Inner Work
Divinity identity is worth more than clan, team, state or national identity when the payoff is ego:soul unification instead of holding a grudge about mama being:
• A “career woman’ which took all of her energy
• Overwhelmed with practical tasks, like moving the house time and time again
• Separated by circumstance (war, natural disaster, economic calamity, prison..)
• Having too many children to attend to
• Working two jobs to keep a roof over your head
How to Reconnect with Motherland Energy
To sacrifice something is to let go of something of value for something else of greater value. Motherland is our emotional connection to our place of birth whereas Fatherland a patriotic connection to a property gained and maintained through warfare. To end the war, requires ongoing sacrifice of the ego identified with Motherland above the acknowledgment of Divine Mother; Self Inquiry of Great Mother; Processing of Birth Mother and Being Real with Earth Mother.
Our priorities must be in order to do this kind of inner work. It pays peace dividends by refocusing from material crisis triggers to the daily practice of healing the internal divide.
Picking weeds is a daily chore, and for many the very ground or land we were born has been either plucked from us or we have been uprooted from it.
We are healed when the war within ends.
#6 Other Mother
How it shows up
Perceived Other Mother separation is a maternal attachment crisis. Experienced as a lack of self awareness. A void in self identity, an important piece of information intentionally hidden, or a profound sense that something is always missing.
Where it shows up
Wounding of the throat and inner eye chakras associated with the abilities to perceive, conceive and speak our personal truth as well as hear and see others through mystical visions, clairvoyance, the ability to observe chakras and auras, precognition and out-of-body experiences. It is where we develop an impersonal mind and detach from physical and mental illusions.
Why it shows up
One feels internal division creating challenges with self trust leading to self sabotage.
Lacking a full sense of identity one’s entire focus is in achieving one either by the approval and acceptance of surrogate or adoptive mother figures, and, or birth mother reunion.
Inner Work
Instead of emotional dysregulation from people pleasing to gain trust to aggressively demanding love, ask for help. Learning to trust is difficult but the good news is we have angels, guides and ancestors specifically assigned to support us and our evolution, to rely on for guidance. They are experienced in our unique needs, challenges and type of wounding of this multiple party soul contract. Once invited and communication is established and maintained, they work with us to on daily tasks to strengthen our sense of self reliance, resilience and loving detachment from maternal abandonment, and or abuse. This helps us to regulate triggers around mama being:
• Crowded out by someone else taking over the mothering role
• Busy taking care of someone else (sibling, ill parent, spouse, herself, etc.)
How to Reconnect with Other Mother Energy
The Other Mother expression of Divine Mother is about coming to terms with her infinite variant expressions, including surrogate, adoptive, foster, earth and spiritual angels, our maternal guides and ancestors. Divine Mother is not limited by our dictates which is proven by her inexhaustible power to reach us when we most need her love.
We feel separated by that love when we are conditioned not to recognize her vastness within and without our conditioned judgments and limited expectations of how, when and why is should be. It just is.
Divinity Identity Mantra
Years ago, when I began downloading this work I asked Great Mother, “If there is one thing you want everyone who is suffering from the mother wound to know, what is it”? She replied, “Tell them that they are:
dearly loved divine child of the Divine Mother Father God who are never judged, condemned or left alone.
About the Mama Drama Trauma Academy
The divine mantra is the basis of The Mama Drama Trauma Healing Oracle Deck used by MDT coaches, MDTA (Mama Drama Trauma Academy), and the Divinity Identity Healing Method curriculum. Blogs and podcasts are available to free subscribers. Paid subscribers interested in becoming MDT informed coaches course, or specific guidance in using MDT tools for self regulation receive weekly video teachings in practical application.
Which of the five types describes your wound also reveals how to use the divinity identity mantra to reconnect. Doing the work is its own reward. Become a MDTA paid subscriber for step by step guidance and encouragement.*
MDT Academy teaches how to reconnect with the mother through the wound in a way that meets your unique needs. By focusing is where the wound is showing up, whether it is a lack of presence in our own lives, an inability to care for, and, or defend ourselves, a spiritual crisis (divine mother), soul crisis (great mother), mental crisis (earth mother), emotional crisis (birth mother), material crisis (motherland), and, or identity crisis (other mother), by becoming aware of its affects, and the inner work we need, we can always divinely align.
I hope these tips, tools and techniques help you experience less shame, blame and guilt from the mother wound and more happy, healthy and wholeness. When experienced as pain, the mother wound feels hollow and conditional, but with a self love practice that allows us to go inside of ourselves we can pull back the layers to see the blessing in disguise to strengthen our ability to accept your divine power to release the perception of Mother Sin at will.
Which of the five types describes your wound also reveal how to reconnect. Doing the work is its own reward. Become a MDTA paid subscriber for step by step guidance and encouragement.*
*Disclaimer: MDTA is for individuals ready, able and willing to do the inner work to heal Mama Drama Trauma.
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The 6 Mother Wound Types